Tomorrow morning I drive to the Santa Cruz mountains to teach, perform and hoop it up with 100 amazing hoop dancers at Hoop Camp in Santa Cruz. There isn't great reception there, so I will be in a bit of a forced "time out" from the rest of the world. Considering the last week I have been glued to the news, social media and the heaviest of issues of our current time, the prospect of being disconnected is a both a relief and guilt inducing. I am relieved because I have fallen off my own advice a bit and totally inundated myself with all the hard stuff of life and not as much of the self care and soul enriching stuff. What with all the reading up on history, various sides of the current issues facing Americans and engaging in LOTS of dialogue, my head is spinning and I'm feeling not as connected to my breath and body. For this reason alone, I am eager to get into the redwoods and DANCE. I am curious what new perspectives I will discover with a little bit of geographical distance from city life, plus disconnection from social media. The guilt feels a bit like the pressure a solider might feel in the trenches, taking a forced rest, while his buddies are still on the battle field. REST is crucial though. I know this.
Another aspect of my mixed feeling is that I have been logging enough fear hours in the last week that I find myself worrying about the safety of my family here in LA while I am gone.. What if? What if?? What IF???? SIGH. Taking deep breaths and reminding myself that all there is to do is TRUST and do my best to live each moment as fully as I can. To embrace the entirety of my experience and be curious about the experience of those around me. To step up to the plate for my classes and performances. And finally, to let go with wild abandon on the dance floor, because it is MEDICINE.
Those of you not at hoop camp, I'll see you all on the flip side! Be kind, be courageous, be curious. I love you!